The hardest part about a blog is, in not keeping up with it super regularly, having to through "where do I even begin?" I feel like so much happens in any given day that summarizing just doesn't seem accurate. But I suppose that's true of anytime you even explain your day to someone. At least for me, unless it's a really bad or really good day, it's pretty much "a day." Though it's great if I end it on a good note, I can't really say "it's been a good day" because that blends the morning of, for example, being yelled at by a student or called a "little 12-year-old girl", into the category of "good." Anyway, on to something concrete!
Some quick facts/recap:
I'm not working on a farm, contrary to what many of my friends think! (And to be honest, I thought there would be more farm-like stuff here...no. A small garden and a horse barn down the road that we've only been to once). Instead, I'm working at a residential treatment facility for emotionally disturbed/troubled youth (5-20 yrs old) 30 min from Atlanta as an AmeriCorps volunteer. I work with the 13 lower cognitive (IQ 52-70) adolescent girls (also called "Unit 3") from 9am-3pm Mon-Thurs, then planning or after-school for a few more hours with any Unit, and Fridays we do service projects in a different location every week. Unit 3 has borderline, bipolar, severe ADHD, explosive behavior, anger management issues, suicidal tendencies, etc. Units are divided by sex, cognition, and reason why they're there. Some are on probation or coming from the juvi system, others have sexual issues, and others are like my Unit. We live in cabins 5 min walk or less to exposure of the kids --> kinda a lack of privacy. There are 20 other volunteers, 4 of which are male. Who runs the world? Girls.
Once training ended a few weeks ago, we were thrown into the reins, or the gladiator arena, or the shark pool. I thought the teachers were cool (esp. one of them who brings a lot of energy; he's been here only 2 months), but I was shocked at how firm and argumentative the staff (adults who supervise 24-7 in shifts) were with the girls. Training had been flowery. Drilled into our heads was to shower the students with positive feedback, planned ignore on bad behavior/attention-seeking in negative ways, be that smiley, energetic and idealistic volunteer and then do service projects on the side to spread the love. Never argue with the students (it takes two to argue, and esp. with my unit the arguments hardly make any sense so "winning" them isn't even possible). And actually, I believe I should be following that training - lord knows they could use more joy in their lives. But it was confusing the bananas out of me to see so little of that from some of the staff that I became really frustrated my first week there. Now that it's been 3 weeks, I don't have as much of that feeling anymore. I'm either hearing the comments differently or there are less of them. I understand that my role is different from staff and teachers, so perhaps their treatment of the kids is the "setting them straight" in a way that they also need. I also notice myself warming up to acting more affirmative and a little less scared of making a mistake or being verbally, possibly physically, attacked. I'm usually one to keep my mouth shut when it comes to a more tense situation in the classroom, but I think this experience will help expand my capacity for learning when it's maybe better to tell it like it is, when it is. That will not happen overnight, I know that much!
I've noticed that I hold tension in my jaw and by the end of the day, I have a jaw-(and sometimes head-) ache. But I release some of that tension from laughing (inside or outside) at all the hilarious things the kids or teachers say or do throughout the day. Mr. Lewis (my favorite teacher) does not hold back any of his thoughts and is absolutely hilarious. He makes fun of the kids all the time in front of them in such a playful and well-meaning manner. One girl is an especially easy target because she pulls out so much stuff from her shirt (Mary Poppins style) that you wonder if she has a whole fridge and drawer in there. Same girl that was trying to hide (or sleep?) under the dirtiest rug one day, or looks like a little girl but has the best stank-eye of anyone I know. haha I'm laughing just thinking about her. But yeah, same girl that had to be held back from school because she kept yelling/threatening after "I wouldn't help her" (aka give her the answer to a math problem). They're all so unique and annoying in any given day it's amazing.
